Friday, February 1, 2008

Desperate Times

(Warning the following blog may contain adult content. The views expressed herein may not be an accurate representation of the views of all members of this or any other related blog)

You know how, in the arrogance of youth, you make fun of, or at least feel immune to, the ailments experienced by those of, shall we say, a more advanced age? Well, a couple of months ago I discovered that I had contracted the dreaded PBFB – otherwise known as Post-Baby Flat Butt. We’ve all seen it, what used to be a nicely rounded, perky bum that sat up parallel to the hips suddenly becomes a long extension of the back which melts into the upper thigh, ledgeless and undefined. I used to say in high school that I could pretty much pick out ladies that have four or more children based upon the shape (or lack thereof) of their hind end. If you don’t know what I am talking about, consider ignorance bliss and disregard this entire lament.

Well, among all the other things that surely would never happen to me (including marrying young, having children before graduating from college, working at Wal-Mart) I passed by the mirror at just the right angle and holy-cow there it was – or wasn’t as the case may be. I am trying to remedy the situation by adding exercise into Rylee and my morning schedule. It’s been going well for about a month and I thought I would share the results. I didn’t include a headshot, because, ummm, I was having a bad hair day. Anyhow, if anyone knows of an anti-PBFB solution I’m all ears. Well, gotta go run my application into Wal-Mart now!


11 comments:

Amy said...

YOU LOOK FANTASTIC! In person too.... seriously.

I had no idea Wal-Mart is hiring? swing by and pick me up so I can apply too ;)

Q and T McKnight said...

Oh my word - you have the cutest darn shape! Next time you get depressed about your body shape come on over. I will show you what happens after 40. When I take my control top panty hose off at night - run for your life - it's a pitiful sight. Kari, enjoy your youth - it only gets better (??) with age?!

Alissa said...

Wow, South Dakota looks quite warm... maybe this picture was taken during the heat wave you had a few weeks ago? :-)

Oh, and I think I'd rather have a butt that melts into my thighs than have one that extends 4 feet in all directions...

Good luck on the exercise thing. I did it - for about 2 weeks. Then I got sick, then I decided that really, who cares if I sleep in and don't have time to shower? No one but Don and Cole see me anyway, and they're stuck with me for eternity, so why bother getting up early enough to work out and shower anyway? So...hopefully you have more determination than I do!

Brandon and Brittany said...

Kari, this is why you need to be a more serious blogger: you are hilarious! Brandon and I just laughed and laughed. We really miss you guys. I hope your friends out there realize how fortunate they are to associate with you on a regular basis, lucky bums!

Gwen said...

Kari-I just love you!!! Thanks for the good laugh!!!

Sister Savanah Jo Ward said...

If you're worried about the lack thereof I would be more than willing to share my excess. Now, if I remember correctly, didn't the last time you tried this exercise thing (walking with me), didn't you gain 5 pounds? Just checking!

Sister Savanah Jo Ward said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Amy said...

Are you kidding? You look fantastic after four kids! You are so much fun! Move closer so we can work out together!!!

Perpetual Mommy Exhaustion said...

Why can't we get a post-baby flat belly. I don't remember voting for flat butts. Lets sue.

Daniel, Kari and Co. said...

Emily - It may actually be possilbe to get post-baby flat belly, one just would have to look underneath the new and improved post-baby long breasts that are covering up the midsection down to the navel - - - Or maybe that's just me!

Daniel, Kari and Co. said...

Amy W. - thanks, that little reminder is really encouraging (however, it may be my ticket to justifiable excuses for easing up on my regime). I mean there's no reason to invite an extra 5 pounds, right?